TftDS: The final paragraph

I present to you: The final paragraph of the last story from Tales from the Driver’s Side.

 

     Looking back, I would have to classify this ride as “confusing.”  There is the part of me that thinks it was just another ride that has had a few too many and getting flirty.  There’s also another part of me that’s humming that song from An American Tail “There are no cats in America.”  But there is another part of me that thinks it was all just an elaborate joke.  I think I got trolled.  I think she was just playing “let’s fuck with the driver” because if you seriously wanted to do something such as she did, you wouldn’t stay on the phone and squander your whole chance.  As soon as the idea took a hold of your brain, you’d tell your little friend “I gotta go, I’m gonna take a shot in the mouth.  I’ll call you back after I swallow this hot load.”  Then, you’d take out a hair tie, put that shit up, and slob on that thing like you all life on this planet has been wiped out and this 3.7mL of seminal fluid is your last chance for survival.  The only thing more embarrassing than that description is the fact that “what’s the average volume of a human male ejaculation” is now in my browser history.

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2 Replies to “TftDS: The final paragraph”

  1. Heeeeeey cool blog bro! The CG is strong in this one.
    (Oh and the elaborate joke was on the gullible mice. There’s HELLA FUCKIN CATS IN AMERICA!!! Haha! Streets are made out of dick cheese maybe. ((Depending on their geographical location they could be made out of broken dreams, hooker secretions (((vaginal))) orphan tears, meth – just straight meth, civil unrest, homeless fecal matter, and in most cases high fructose corn syrup.)) oh man. Thanks for that childhood trip down memory lane. Heard most the mice either got into porn (see Back Door Rodent Slutz 1-7) or joined some cult and drank some shit out of a punch bowl that was “for real gonna take them to the REAL place that has no cats and the streets are made of cheese”. I heard it Didn’t quite go as planned. Well, truth be told some crazy dude told em that but really he just put poison in the drinks to kill em. But hey, who needs a travel ban when the incoming banned are upidstay asses…say? Fuck it. RIP DON BLUTH – Tru Nigga 4 ReaL Be Eazy Dom DeLoise ya rat bastard ya! (Big Pun Intended) holy fuck that was incredible. I channeled Charlie Sheen now I am drained….Back to CG to re-energize.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I appreciate the support! If you like that I’m hoping you’ll love the final copy it’s full of shit like that and much worse. I’ll throw up some CG exclusive material on my profile.

      Like

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